Naoma Bennion Hendrickson

So, the last five days with my baby have been SO hard. He's had all sorts of crazy medical stuff going on, and next to the first newborn week, this has been one of the hardest mom weeks of my life, honestly. The kids gone from a nightly cough to a throat so bad the doctor thought he had strep (but couldn't take a culture due to another antibiotic he'd taken). He had a fever over 103, he threw up, he wouldn't eat or drink, was nearly dehydrated and woke up multiple times a night. He threw tantrums and had attitude worse than I've seen from any of my children... ever. It was five days that being a mom wasn't the most enjoyable experience. Thankfully, I have an awesome mom who came to the rescue a couple times to give me little 'sanity' breaks. In two days Crew will be 20 months. When my mom was 20 months, her mother died of spinal meningitis. She sent me this tonight. It really helped me to put things into perspective; Crew needs me, even though and when being a mother is the hardest (yet best) thing I've done. I can't imagine, as a mother, knowing that my life was coming to an end, knowing that your children's rock in life was shortly going to be gone. I am thankful to be a mom, thankful to have a mom who despite having a very rough childhood makes no excuses for herself. I hope that I can be the kind of mom that my children are proud of, despite weeks like this one.

(Below is the bio of Naoma Bennion Hendrickson that my mom sent me. They are some spelling errors, but I left it as is. I can't wait until the day I get to meet this woman... PS- My and Kennedy's name sake, Naoma.)

MY MOTHER WAS NAOMA BENNION HENDRICKSON THE SIXTH CHILD OF TEN BORN TO MARY MINERVA CLARK BENNION AND EDWIN, SHE BORN MAY 17, 1917. THE BENNION FAMILY CHILDREN ARE HELEN BORN JUNE 25, 1908, DONALD CLARK BORN JULY 30, 1910, MELBA BORN JULY 26. 1912, HAROLD CLARK BORN SEPT. 12, 1914, NAOMA BORN MAY 17 1917,OWEN CLARK BORN MAY 11, 1919, THEODORE CLARK BORN JUNE 26,1922, HARDEN CLARK BORN SEPT. 27 1924, PAUL CLARK BORN MAR.18. 1929.

MY MOTHER PASSED AWAY WHEN I WAS 20 MONTHS OLD.

NAOMA’S FATHER DIED APRIL 3, 1930 FROM DIABETES WHEN SHE WAS ONLY 12 YEARS OLD.

I’M SURE SHE LEARNED TO BE INDUSTRIOUS AND LEARN TO VALUE EDUCATION AND HARD WORK. SHE MUST HAVE HAD THE SPIRIT OF CHARITY AND THE WILLINGNESS TO HELP OTHERS. DURING THE WAR SHE WRITES HOW SHE WOULD BE HELPING A NEIGHBOR IN NEED OR HOW GOOD IT WAS TO GET FRESH FRUIT FROM SOME ONE ELSE. THERE WAS A SPECIAL BOND AND A “HELPING EACH OTHER” ATTITUDE.

MY GRANDMOTHER WAS THE LINK I HAD TO GET TO KNOW WHO MY MOTHER WAS SINCE I HAD NO RECOLLECTION OF HER. THE PEOPLE THAT I HAVE MEET THAT KNEW HER WOULD INVARIABLY SAY” OH HOW I LOVED YOUR MOTHER!” “YOU RESEMBLE YOUR MOTHER SO MUCH.” MY GRANDMOTHER SAID WHEN I WAS AROUND IT WAS LIKE HAVING NAOMA BACK. I ENJOYED VISITING MY GRANDMOTHER. I LEARN TO APPRECIATE MY HERITAGE AND TO LEARN ABOUT A MOTHER I COULD NOT REMEMBER AND KNOW OF THE LOVE SHE AND HER FAMILY HAD FOR MY BROTHER AND ME. THIS WAS A TIME I WAS HAVING DIFFICULTLY WITH SELF-ESTEEM AND I REALLY FELT A BONDING AND A SENSE OF BELONGING. I STILL DO NOT KNOW A GREAT DEAL ABOUT NAOMA’S CHILDHOOD. OF COURSE GROWING UP WITHOUT HER FATHER IN A LARGE FAMILY DURING THE DEPRESSION MUST HAVE BEEN VERY TRYING TO SAY THE LEAST. I STAYED IN FARMINGTON ONLY A WEEK AT A TIME WHEN I WAS 11, 12 and 13 YEARS OLD.

ONCE WHILE I WAS VISITING MY GRANDMOTHER, I WAS APPROACHED BY A MAN THAT ASKED, “ARE YOU NAOMAS’ DAUGHTER? “YES,” “I LOVED YOUR MOTHER AND IF SHE WOULD HAVE MARRIED ME YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN MY DAUGHTER” I FELT AWKWARD AND DIDN'T REPLY.

LATER, WHEN I WAS TAKING DAL TO THE U. OF U. FOR PRESCHOOL CLASSES. I GOT TO KNOW MY MOTHERS AUNT EDNA ERICKSON. SHE LIVED BY THE U. OF U. AS HER HUSBAND WAS A PROFESSOR THERE AND MY MOTHER HAD STAYED WITH HER FOR A PERIOD OF TIME. I M SURE SHE VISITED HER OFTEN WHEN SHE WAS IN NURSES TRAINING AT THE GENERAL HOSPITAL. AUNT EDNA HAD STAYED WITH MY MOTHER WHEN SHE WAS VERY SICK AND DYING IN THE HOSPITAL. SHE TOOK TURNS WATCHING BRENT AND MYSELF AT THAT TIME. SHE TOLD MY HOW VERY CONCERNED MY MOTHER HAD BEEN ABOUT THE WELFARE OF THE TWO OF US KNOWING SHE WAS GOING TO DIE, HER GREATEST FEAR WAS IN LEAVING THE TWINS. SHE HAD ASKED EDNA (AND EVERYONE ELSE THAT COME TO SEE HER) TO LOOK OUT AFTER US AND TAKE CARE OF US. AS I HAVE WATCHED MY OWN CHILDREN GROW AND ESPECIALLY AT THE AGE WE WERE, 20 MONTHS, AND THOUGHT ABOUT MY MOTHERS CIRCUMSTANCE, THE DIFFICULTY OF KNOWING HER ILLNESS WAS SO SERIOUS SHE WOULD DIE, THE THOUGHT OF LEAVING MY OWN CHILD BEHIND MY HEART HAS BROKE KNOWING WHAT SHE MUST HAVE GONE THROUGH!

AT 2O MONTHS OF AGE A BABY AND MOTHERS LIFE IS SO INTERTWINED. AS BABIES THEY ARE SO DEPENDENT ON THEIR MOTHER FOR EVERY SINGLE NEED FOR LIFE. AND LOVE. AT THAT EARLY AGE I DO NOT REMEMBER MY MOTHER. BUT I’M SURE WE WERE VERY MUCH IMPACTED EMOTIONALLY BY HER DEATH.

I CANNOT SAY HOW OUR LIVES WOULD HAVE BEEN HAD SHE LIVED, I ONLY KNOW HOW THINKS HAVE BEEN. SHE WAS MY PERFECT ANGEL MOTHER, IT IS NOT FAIR TO COMPARE THAT THAT CANNOT BE. KNOWING GOD IS A PARENT, I KNOW SHE HAS BEEN ALLOWED TO BE A PART OF OUR LIVES. I KNOW SHE HAS BEEN WITH ME THROUGH THE JOYS AND THE SORROWS, THE PAIN AND THE TRIALS, THE HARDSHIPS AND MOMENTS OF DESPAIR. MY MOTHER WAS THERE FOR THE BIRTH OF MY CHILDREN, THEIR MARRIAGES AND TIMES OF ACHIEVEMENT. KNOWING THIS IT MADE IT EASIER FOR ME TO FOLLOW THE RIGHT PATHS. KNOWING SHE KNOWS, AS A TEENAGER NOTHING WAS TOTALLY PRIVATE. FOR THIS REASON, KNOWING MY MOTHER WAS WATCHING, I MADE DECISIONS THAT I MIGHT NOT HAVE MADE.